A laugh now and then is a good thing, and my kids provide plenty of opportunities. Watch this page for silly stories and amusing moments.
Random, 09/22/12During breakfast:
G: "I almost stored candy up for the winter one time."
R: "Where?"
G: "In my cheeks."
R: "Why didn't you?"
G: "Because Daddy said it would give me cavities. And I kinda actually wanted to chew and swallow it. And I would choke on it at night."
Z: "I choked once. I wish I were a bat."
Nap Time, 06/20/12
Giving Z a small (tiny, really) piece of chocolate before his afternoon nap turned out to be a mistake. He complained that G didn't have to take a nap ("He's 5 and you're 3," I tried to explain) and that he didn't want to be alone, but I tucked him in and closed the door. Thirty minutes later I heard a tap-tap on my door.
"Mommy," he asked hopefully, "what time is my nap over?"
"3:30," I replied, "Now go get back in bed." I tucked him in again and figured he'd drop off while staring at G's clock on their bookshelf. After another twenty minutes I heard the tap-tap on my door again.
"Mommy," Z said, "I forgot--I can't tell what time it is!"
Ice Cream, 06/03/12
Poor little G has had the stomach flu and wasn't able to eat anything at all yesterday. For the big eater he is, that has left quite a deficit! This morning he was feeling a bit better and enjoyed a mild fruit smoothie.
Then he had another idea.
G: Mommy, can I have some ice cream?
R: I don't think that's a good idea.
G: But it will make me feel better!
R: I don't think it will.
G: It will--if it has chocolate sauce on it!
Knock-knock Part 2, 06/02/12
Z is making progress in his joke telling.
Z: Knock knock!
R: Who's there?
Z: Banana.
R: Banana who?
**repeat 3 times, then--
Z: Knock knock!
R: Who's there?
Z: Orange! I'm so glad I didn't say "banana" again!
Hat Fit, 05/28/12
Classical Music, 05/08/12
While in the car today, I turned the radio to the classical station and caught the very beginnings of what I identified as a Baroque bassoon concerto. It was quite a virtuosic piece, with the bassoon really Baroquing-it up with rapid, rhythmic scales and trills.
Glancing to the back seat, I saw Z grinning and head-banging to the bassoon! Of course, I love it when my kids enjoy classical music. I told him the name of the instrument, and mentioned that violins and a harpsichord were playing (between bassoon riffs), as well.
He continued to bop his head a little longer and then asked, "Mommy, what's that instrument again?"
"A bassoon," I answered.
"No, the beautiful part!"
"Oh." I deflated slightly. "That's the violins."
Just the Facts, 04/30/12
G has become interested in reading the Nutrition Facts on food labels. His reading isn't quite on par with his enthusiasm, so this is what I heard this morning (the numbers are made up, but see if you can translate the rest).
Total number of savings, 45.
Total colors, 36.
Fat, 10 g.
Sat fat, 3 g.
Train fat, 0 g.
Chol--chol-- Mommy, what's chol--? 15 mg.
Sodium, 100 mg. Wow Mommy, that's a LOT!
Diet fiber, 1 g.
Sugar, 0 g. Mommy, there's no sugar so this is healthy!!
Protein, 8 g. 8 g protein, Mommy!
Drawings, 04/25/12
G decided he'd like to draw me a picture today, but before putting the pencil to the paper, he asked, "Mommy, do you like anything I draw?" I almost hesitated but said that of course I did. "Good," he replied, "I'm going to draw a scary picture."
He proceeded to pencil a monster with large eyes, hands with blades for fingers, and two dagger-like teeth. "Is it scary Mommy?" he asked brightly. I playfully told him it was, and congratulated myself for being so affirming of his boyish interests.
But as he began to spin a story for me surrounding this monster, he realized the drawing wasn't complete, and ran to fetch a red crayon. Then my claim that I liked anything he drew was sorely tested.
Red crayon in hand, he began liberally embellishing the picture, narrating as he went. "Look at this blood on the bad monster's hands, from attacking his enemies. Look at this blood on his teeth, from biting them. Look at this blood on his face. Look at this blood dripping onto his head. Look at this blood dripping down here."
By the end of the story, most of the page had turned crimson and I was truthfully feeling a bit squeamish, but G was only getting started. "Mommy, I need more paper!" Yes you do, and I need a tea party with hats and dolls and a bouquet of daffodils.
Freeze Tag, 04/19/12
G, Z, and I played a little game of freeze tag in the living room today. Z decided he wanted a turn to be It, so he began to chase G. They raced around the couch, with Z never being able to catch up to the long-legged G. Finally, after about six loops around the couch, Z suddenly stopped.
"Hey!" he exclaimed, thrusting out his chin and slamming his fists on his waist, "I just remembered I can freeze from far away." He thrust out an open palm toward G. "ZAAAAP!"
Knock-knock, 04/18/12
G took me through the old joke, "Mommy, will you remember me next week?" Yes. "Will you remember me next month?" Yes. "Will you remember me next year?" Yes.
Then comes the punchline.
G: Knock-knock!
R: Who's there?
G: Hey, you forgot me already!
Of course then Z wants in on the action. This was his joke:
Z: Knock-knock?
R: Who's there?
Z: You forgot me already!
Huge I-just-tricked-Mommy grin. Not a funny joke, but an adorable jokester!
Muffins, 04/13/12
This morning I decided to use up some of the zucchini in the fridge by making muffins (no, that's not a contradiction). Z, while highly enthusiastic about the idea, has had difficulty with what to call the things. "Muffins," I'll say, and two minutes later, "Waffles?" he asks. "Zucchini," I'll pronounce, and a little later, I hear him trying to describe the things to G. "Waffles. Newssiki waffles. Newssiki muffins. Zussicki muffins. Waffles?"
Then a while after breakfast, I was putting away the leftovers when he came back into the kitchen. "Mommy, could I have another...whatever it is?"
Powerfulness, 04/11/12
A commonly-heard claim around here is "My ____ is powerfuller than your ____!" Today it was swords.
Z: My sword is powerfuller than your sword!
G: How powerful is it?
Z: 76 powerfuls!
G: Well mine is 732.
Z: Yeah, so is mine!
G: Okay, so I guess both our swords are powerfuller than our guns.
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